My Medical Tests & Exams are Starting to Come In &...?

It's bad.

Can't say I am shocked by this, but...?

Some of these issues are literally conflicting in treatment-nature, meaning?

To treat one, on a daily-basis, causes ANOTHER TO FLARE UP.

Which is lovely, that's great, absolutely great.

So I'm processing all of this now & being confronted by the Fact that had I simply been a lazy-fuck & not given a shit about My Dayjob, then...?

I wouldn't have gotten injured.

Oh and of course I also have something called Tarlov Cysts, which, also came from the injury, which is, yeah, yeah.

That's great.

Meanwhile?

The Workman's Comp Doctor of Worknet had flat out refused to follow up on what the Physical-Therapist said regarding THE FACT THAT...?

She found two vertebrae that are NOT FUNCTIONING PROPERLY.

-_-

Well...?

The MRI on My Lower-Spine found a BLOCK-PARTY OF AILMENTS ALL CAUSED FROM ONE INJURY.

Lovely.

So?

Now I'm, OH, WAIT, irony!?

I had to call out from the Dayjob because I COULDN'T MOVE.

I then have LITERALLY BEEN ASLEEP ALL DAY TILL YOUNGEST BROTHER CALLED & WOKE ME UP.

That's awesome, just, fuckin awesome.

I'm also faced with the Fact that now, whether I want to OR NOT.

-_-

If I DON'T WANT TO FUCK MYSELF UP WORSE THAN I ALREADY AM...?

I'm going to HAVE TO BUY A CAR.

Great.

More Bills.

Lovely.

AWESOME.

All because I actually DO MY JOB AT MY DAYJOB.

OH AND BY THE WAY!?

Everybody IS EXTREMELY COOPERATIVE & HELPFUL AT MY DAYJOB, by the Way.

Because of the Fact I DO MY JOB.

My Boss when I called out ASKED IF I NEEDED TO TAKE TOMORROW OFF AS WELL. And pointed out that yes, I have the time-&-the means & he'd mark it down.

But, you know, My People are lazy & don't want to work &, I do need to point out that the Source of My Injury came from THE CHILDISHLY TRIFLING WHITE-COWORKERS WHO SIMPLY AREN'T SUPPOSED TO GET INTO TROUBLE FOR THEIR BEHAVIOR.

Just needed to ADD THAT PART.

Because I've SAT ON THAT since I got injured.

And of course EVERYONE BENT OVER BACKWARDS TO CLAIM NOTHING COULD BE DONE, until I was out for 3-months & then ALL OF THEM SAW "Uhhhm...? Noth, nothing works around here & nothing is in order!? WHERE!? WHEN IS SHAWN COMING BACK!? THIS FUCKIN PLACE IS IN FUCKIN DISARRAY! AND THIS OTHER GUY ISN'T DOING SHIT ABOUT SHIT!"

Huh.

Shocker.

-_-

Ok that's it.

Tarlov.

Cyst.

ON MY SPINE.

Lovely.

THAT'S GREAT!

But now I know why My fuckin spine keeps fuckin burning & my legs fuck up & go numb, AWESOME!

And yet, as You can see, I'm still working.

Cuz you know, lazy Black-American Man here!

YEP!

Literally I am being faced with the Fact THAT HAD I BEEN LAZY?

I wouldn't be fucked up right now.

LET THAT SHIT SINK IN!

I KNOW I'M LOVIN IT RIGHT NOW!

I also had NO CLUE just HOW VULNERABLE THE SPINE-&-BACK ARE ONCE YOU INJURE EITHER ONE ONCE!

What.

The.

Fuck.

One time.

IS ALL IT TAKES.

To COMPLETELY FUCK YOURSELF UP FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, great, awesome, AND MIND YOU!?

This is why I NEVER COMPLAIN ABOUT HOW MUCH ATHLETES GET PAID, by the Way.

ALL RIGHT!

That's enough from Me.

I?

Am going to slowly make myself something to eat, because all I've done is get hopped up on pain-meds & sleep all day!

BUT LOOK AT THE IRONY!?

One of My Talents CENTERS AROUND WRITING-&-DRAWING.

Where I am LITERALLY HAVING IT LAID OUT IN FRONT OF ME AGAIN:

"Hey!? You might wanna SPEED IT UP WITH WHAT YOU'RE DOING WITH THAT BECAUSE YOUR FUCKIN PHYSICAL BODY IS ON THE VERGE OF COMPLETE FUCKIN COLLAPSE!!!!!"

Then I remember, oh yeah...?

This was why I needed to get divorced from My Ex-Wife.

Because MY PHYSICAL FUCKIN BODY WAS ON THE VERGE OF COLLAPSE BACK THEN!

And she made it clear she was NOT going to support Me in crossing over into using my writing & artistic-talents as my main source of professional-income. Because she was CERTAIN that I'd become successful & then I'd have COMPLETE AUTHORITY OVER HER & HOW OUR FAMILY WOULD WORK, and no, I am NOT KIDDING, when I type that.

White-People aren't the only ones fearful of Black-American Men having the actual money & financial-freedom to then CONTROL their time & environment, due to their success WITH THEIR OWN ABILITIES.

Which is unfortunate, BUT...!?

Was intentionally designed when Whites enslaved Us & gained FULL CONTROL OVER WHAT WE COULD & COULD NOT DO.

As Their Slaves.

EITHER WAY!?

I'm not dead yet, so...?

I'll take some moments of time to take all of this in.

AND THEN IT'S BACK TO WORK ON REBUILDING MY LIFE!