I SPEAK!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
HEREWEGO!!!!!

GOOD AFTERNOON FROM FLEXIN IN UPPER DARBY!

How's everybody DOING TODAY!? I am telling you RIGHT NOW!? TODAY!? Is going to be a RETURN TO NORMAL for Me and My Blog! Which means today there WILL BE AT LEAST, AT

LEAST! TEN POSTS! Mind you I'm actually way behind on posts to PUT UP! But between work AND HONESTLY FOCUSING ON TYPING for Williams Works!? As you can see my post count FOR ME!? Is mad low, SON! All bullshit aside? All jokes aside.

I have stated from day-1 that My Blog finally came into existence, because of the fact that I was tired of keeping the Secrets of Others. While said Others proceeded to be the biggest scum-&-douche bags on the planet. Knowing that if I was really an asshole I could utterly destroy them simply by telling the truth.

One of these people whose secrets I kept was My Former Fiancee, Stacey. A Coloured South African Woman whom I loved and STILL LOVE. But saw THE FACT that she is self-destructive and selfish to the point of recklessness.
The phone call I got from her Side-Piece Chick-Dude was both insightful and boring, because I'd accurately predicted what kind of Nigger he is and was and it was something long before now. When Stacey and I were together, that bothered her. I have found that my ability to predict people's outcomes generally sends the weak-minded and dishonest scurrying and claiming I have some sort of "supernatural ability". The weak-minded and questionable types are always the ones to claim superstitious shit when confronted with something they can't understand, do themselves or deal with. When the reality is that what they're really more concerned about is being exposed in some way, shape, or form, for who and what they truly are.

Today I did not get any calls from Troubleman in South Africa, because I didn't need to. Once you know how someone thinks and feels, their patterns of behavior and decision-making become as easy to predict as walking. If you can then make an honest-assessment of said person's or peoples environment? Then you can not only anticipate their moves, but actually know where they are going to be. Now? If you become or gain any ability to CONTROL their environment? At that point?

You got'em. You literally can control the person without actually saying anything to them. Because you already know how they think. So once you gain the ability to control THEIR ENVIRONMENT? Then everything is on you to fuck it up some how. You would have to be the reason for failure, because once you gain, through whatever means you gained it, the ability to control the person's environment? You honestly no longer need to see them at all. You WILL need to occasionally have physical eyes on the ground to watch and make sure that the person is still moving in the predicted patterns, but everything else is simply "maintenance". And I type all of this to show My Own People here in Nazi-America, that this is why the Nazi-Cops are so critical in Our Neighborhoods. They function as Nazi-Americas eyes-&-ears to make sure that we still move in predicted patterns so that we can be controlled and exploited and extinguished when or if needed.

I've typed all of that, just to show you that the following post, which I decided to copy and paste here from Stacey's blogsite, VERIFIES what I have typed and talked to you about. Where again? You see within it the MASSIVE DIFFERENCE between Her and I and why I decided to go my own way and give Stacey the predictable option of betraying and abandoning me. For me? I don't like when someone cons me. I don't like loving someone who is a con-artist and liar. Call me what you wish, but I truly do hate con-artists. And I'll reveal why at another time, but needless to say. I had a best friend growing up whom I idolized and ultimately I found out he was a massive, MASSIVE. Con-artist and fraud. I hate frauds. I hate phonies. And? I hate cowards.

Now? For some of you, you can say to yourself or think "That's a lot of hate, Shawn." and to that I say "These are not traits that are to be loved or liked. All of these particular traits are traits that root into the trait of being untrustworthy. So? I trust you can now see why I am not pleased with having been fooled by Stacey and then deciding to keep going until reality decided to have a nice little talk with me off to the side."

This brings me to why I decided to post this here, a blog post from Stacey. Yesterday. Where? Read it. Read it and remember that her post on Her Birthday claimed "I wasn't worth her time." But then Monday rolls around and the entire post is once again filled with everything that comes from me and Our Time Together. Now? You may say, this is the way shit is. This is the way she is. This is the, hold on there partner. Hold on. I am SHOWING YOU THIS. To show you not just a part of ME. But also a part of Black Americans in general. People say we have No Culture, hardly. People say we have NO IDENTITY. Hardly.

I will tell you that ONE THING ALL BLACK AMERICANS HATE?
Is when we are not given the Credit We Are DUE for Our Positive Impacts and Results on People, Places and Societies. If there is ONE THING that ALL Black Americans share? It is Our FIERCE HATRED of putting in Work, IN WHATEVER. And things don't work out, then things don't work out. Something FAILED? Failure is a part of Life. But then when we are INTENTIONALLY mocked and deprived of the Credit We Are Due? When someone TRIES TO PROFITEER off of OUR WORK AND THEN NOT EVEN ATTEMPT TO ACKNOWLEDGE US WHILE PROSPERING SOLELY BECAUSE OF US?

Oh?
You done fucked it up, person.
And we will be by to see you.
You can bank on that.
For me? I realized that after awhile, but like I said? I got sloppy with mine. I started all of this go-along to get-along, bullshit. Instead of sticking to a strict regimen of who is allowed within My Inner-Circle and who is to be cut down IMMEDIATELY. For even thinking they could look in my direction while knowing they are an absolute piece of shit, walking. Now? You can think whatever you wish about what I just typed, however? REMEMBER WHERE I LIVE AND THE CONDITIONS OF WHERE I LIVE.

Now? IT SHOULD MAKE SENSE TO YOU NOW. There is NO ROOM. In Nazi-America, as a Black Person, to allow UNTRUSTWORTHY PEOPLE, into Your Inner-Circle. I myself am NOT IMMUNE to what I typed to you at the very top of this. You know, the whole thing about being able to be controlled by environment? It amazes me how careless I've become, but also? How CASUAL too many of us have become regarding who we let into Our Lives. Our Beds. Our Families. So let's take a trip into Stacey's post... And watch, YOU WATCH, how she VERIFIES everything I told you in those Stacey Speaks posts. Where just to do that ONE POST? I had to chop it into THREE SUPER STAR DESTROYER LONG POSTS! Where? Do you think that is even a TENTH, of what went on between us? A TENTH, of the nonsense where I FINALLY got it through My Thick-Skull. I've got to SAVE. MY. SELF. From. MY. SELF.

Love is good. Love is grand. Love is GREAT! But Love? Love can get you fucked up.

And when the person you love is a fraud. A habitual liar. Or someone along those trait-lines? Then of course? Expect them to always never be the problem and THAT IS OKAY, if you go on and get up the road and start getting back to what you're supposed to be doing. Here is the blogpost and some of the things in here were impossible for me not to make a snarky comment on. Some comments are petty on My Part, others? Not so much;

Monday, 12 October 2015

Can't Be Mad at Change

Well? The heat stood no chance against how tired and sore I was last night! After I showered, I put my head on that pillow and went out! Did dream that my eldest brother shot me twice, along with other family members, hahahahhahaha! (Fake laughter aside, this is why once she was confident that I honestly loved her, her first task then became using me as a weapon against her family. So now? How often DO YOU DREAM that a SPECIFIC FAMILY MEMBER KILLS YOU. While the rest of your so-called Happy Family-members, help them) It didn't hurt, don't worry! I recall being quite surprised about that in my dream too! And that I was slit down both sides of my body in some hospital experiment and needed to be stitched up but then found myself walking around and begging the hospital receptionist to send me to a different hospital. (Remember? She talked about how much PEACE she has. And remember I told you, you can't Lie to Yourself. And the One Place that YOUR SELF CAN GET YOU, is in Your Sleep!) Lmao! Wow, I haven't had a dream, any dream that I can I remember in a really long time. (Yet these two just happen to crop up right now? This is another reason why Her Blogsite never went anywhere either. Because what she talks about? It's Meh. It's Blah-blah-blah, Ginger. Blah-blah-blah-blahblahblah-Ginger! That's from the Far Side Comic Strip on what Humans say to Dogs and What Dogs Actually Hear from Humans) Buttttttt?!? 'Tis the morning time now and I am awoke, unshot and unsliced, in my own bed but not without some cyst pain or overall weariness but hey, I'm alive and that's good enough fa me!! (I'm sure it is. Because you work so hard to apply yourself in Life)

I briefly mentioned that our family buried a young member last week. Honestly, I didn't spend any time with Liam, he was part of the family that unfortunately we don't see very often. Actually, the family that I became accustomed to really isn't the family that I recognise now. (I wonder why that is? Probably because a family of rapists and molesters, thieves and embezzlers isn't really a family) And that starts from my own siblings. (O_O!? I'm shocked! ^_^! Shawn Williams is being an asshole, DING!) A lot has happened over the last year that's basically broken us into pieces (You will find that this contradicts blogposts she's made earlier in the year where she was lying about how great things were with all of them. She also claimed she was at so much Peace upon her return. But the only person she came at and named specifics with was/is me. Tell me something reader? What does that mean? Troubleman told me yesterday that he thinks "She still loves you man! And she is pissed that you've done this shit to her!" and I told Him "I still love her too, that doesn't change the fact that the bitch is untrustworthy and a liar. Love doesn't magically change people's ingrained personality-traits. If anything it BRINGS THEM OUT AND EMPHASIZES THEM MORE. So whomever you INHERENTLY ARE? LOVING SOMEONE ELSE, INHERENTLY -_- Look at this shit? My typing IN BETWEEN HER OWN WORDS ENHANCES HER DULL-ASS POST. >_<) and I have found that standing up against my perception of wrong for my perception of right almost always leaves you standing alone where it's been me against my siblings and for the first time in my life I've been okay with being loved but not liked because, well? (Ummmm? Whu, where? Who taught you that? Who TOLD YOU THAT? And why is it My Perception? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Because she don't wanna say Shawn's Perception, where? It ISN'T EVEN MY PERCEPTION OF RIGHT AND WRONG. Everyone knows you don't go to Your Youngest Sisters House. Let Her Soon to Be Divorced From Her Husband, in the House at 1am in the Morning. While you're a GUEST SLEEPING ON HER COUCH cuz you beat the shit outta your wife and got hit with a restraining order. You also DO NOT turn around later and start MOLESTING UP IN SAID HOUSE! Again? You will NOT FIND ONE WORD OF SPECIFICS FROM HER on what in the world she is talking about or why. And it is because she is a coward. But she will GIVE YOU SUPPOSED SPECIFICS ABOUT ME. ^_^! HA! It's so pathetic that it is funny, ALMOST. >_< Funny.) I'm older and I believe that over the past five years or so, I've grown more than I have in my entire life. (Ummmm, I'm sorry, who? 5-years you say? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! WHY!? WHO WAS AROUND DURING THAT TIME!? ^_^!!!! THIS GUY! Who's being an asshole right now! AND LOVIN IT! HAHAHAHAHAHHA!) It's a whole lot easier for me now to open my mouth and stand my ground for what I believe in, than it's ever been and I will say this much. A lot of that comes from what I've learned from being in my previous relationship. (OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! Did I get some CREDIT FOR ONCE!? HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHHAH! Nameless Credit! >_<) If I've taken anything from it, it's been to open my mouth when something isn't right, to me. That's a lesson I needed to learn and one that I'm grateful for!

I'm happy to type that we're mending at the moment, at least some of us are, which is always a good thing and really I've been trying to live life one day at a time, one issue at a time, calmly and level-headed------ly. I used to easily become overwhelmed even at the smallest curve in the road but another thing that I've taken from my previous relationship is to "focus on what's in front of you." It feels easier to focus on that curve as opposed to taking that curve and clouding it with, "my whole life is falling apart". (Um? Didn't? Didn't this woman claim I wasn't worth Her Time? OHHHHH, I see!? Do you see? She APPEARS TO BE trying to pretend like she LEARNED THIS ON HER OWN. That she GREW AND LEARNED THIS. Not? She had to be TAUGHT THIS. Meanwhile? Focus on what's in front of you? Is WORD-FOR-WORD WHAT I USED TO ACTUALLY SAY TO HER WHEN SHE WOULD DO EXACTLY WHAT SHE TYPED. She would LITERALLY fall to pieces EMOTIONALLY, because she'd wasted decades of Her Life, being phony and putting up with horrific ordeal after horrific ordeal FROM HER FAMILY MEMBERS. So? I think you KNOW that under those types of conditions? How can she FUNCTION AND BE PRODUCTIVE ON ANY-LEVEL OF HER LIFE. Add to that the cheating Her and Her Now Ex-Husband were doing? Then their daughter GOT EXPOSED TO ALL OF THIS and slowly but surely their son was too and then by that point Stacey came across Me on Penpals International where I was writing up my first book in way too long. This PARTICULAR POST, is one I am REALLY GOING TO GO OVER WITH MY SON. And show Him, WHAT NOT TO DO. And let Him see, when things are going wrong for you. Bad patches in Life are PART OF IT. But you don't make things WORSE FOR YOURSELF OUT OF FRUSTRATION. That's when you SINK YOURSELF. I had to TEACH STACEY, how to handle Her Anxiety and slow down, because she'd have panic-attacks. Then with HER HEALTH being frailer than Mine? A man who is JUST OUT FOR PUSSY OR WHATEVER? They don't go through all of this if that is all it is about. They don't BRING ANY PERMANENT, POSITIVE, LIFE-CHANGING TECHNIQUES THAT CAN BE TAKEN WITH HER BY THE WOMAN, WHEN THE RELATIONSHIP ENDS.)

The rest of the family? We have all of the love in the world for each other but we don't get together as much as we used to anymore. Some parts of the family dynamic is still the same, like totally enjoying each other when we actually do get together but a lot has changed as far as the amount of time we actually do spend together. That's my opinion. I'm sure at some point on my blog, you've seen me mention that we kinda just find each other wherever we are and gather. It's no longer the case. Everybody is basically living their lives and there's nothing wrong with doing that. The adults are growing, the kids are growing or are grown and are scattering themselves in different parts of the globe. (An attempt at honesty. To a point.)

Me? I try not to leave my house on the weekends at all, LOL! So maybe I'm the problem in the way I feel about the overall family dynamic! Hahahahahaha! I've changed. Maybe I feel that way because I've been spending almost all of my spare time alone at home on weekends or any time that I'm not at work. It's like you need a crane and an army to get me out! Lol! I did get out this weekend though. Rare but of course it does happen from time to time. We have two family weddings coming up, so you know? Bridal showers are part of the process. Then my niece's farewell lunch was on Sunday. But to compare now to how things used to be before, I'd say, chalk and cheese. I guess everybody grows and growing doesn't necessarily mean growing apart, it just means that priorities adjust and really? That's okay, you know. I'm not mad about it at all. I miss it, yeah but I can't be mad about the way that life on the whole, evolves. At the end of the day, as a person or a family unit, progression is important and you can't progress in any area of your life if you're doing the same thing, the same way for its entirety. (I could be here for awhile with this paragraph but I'm not. First? Where? Where is talk of Dave? Where is Her Soulmate to fill in this void? Why is she still in South Africa if this man was soh worth cheating on me with. You get it now, reader. THIS, is why I have done what I have done and IT WAS THE RIGHT DECISION. To punish SOME PEOPLE, PARTICULARLY WOMEN? You force them TO LIVE WITH THEIR WRONG-MINDED DECISIONS. This paragraph reeks of loneliness that is the result of something SHE OPTED TO DO that has NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT SHE HONESTLY JUST SAID. She is NEVER GOING TO TELL YOU that Her and I were INSEPARABLE. And regardless of when we argued or had bad times, I know this is the reason why she "despises me". Because THIS TIME? I'm NOT cleaning up HER DUMB-DECISION. I am NO LONGER AROUND to be the REASON OR CAUSE of whatever knee-jerk jackass decision she decides to do. SO!? Like I told you, now she gets held accountable FOR HER DECISIONS AND THAT'S THE WAY IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE! This paragraph SHOULD NOT BE HERE IF SHIT WAS IN ORDER WITH BABY DAVE EVANS. PERIOD.)

Liam's death shook me up, though. Death always does that to me and then I start thinking about it. A little toooooo much! I've gotten my Will done a while back but one part of it is proving difficult as far as getting someone to handle my writings. I didn't see that coming and it only occurred to me that I need to address it after Liam's death. I already know that I won't rest with leaving my work in the hands of someone who doesn't personally know my children or who won't have their best interests at heart. But I'm working on resolving that issue. (FYI, she already knows the only person who can be trusted to do that is Me. Even with everything that has gone on, she knows the only person who will honestly do right by her or her kids, is me. Fucked up as it is. The reality is that Stacey knows that unfortunately? Her actual time on this earth may be running out. I honestly don't like that thought, because when we were together I know my health is bad. But I am STOUT. I come from a family where my sister was able to walk around with her gall bladder in need of surgery for three or four MONTHS. Where normally whatever was wrong with her KILLS YOU. This is part of the reason why Whites keep pushing that we as Blacks are Superhuman physically and Sub-Human because of it. Meanwhile? Nothing is further from the truth. Black People OVERALL simply have a higher resistance to certain ailments and such, nothing more, nothing less. But it DOES HAVE TO DO WITH THE FACT THAT WE ARE BLACK AND HAVE BLACK BLOOD FLOWING THROUGH OUR VEINS! AND FOR ME!? I am very grateful and proud of that.) But? Did you guys know that unlike in the US, here in South Africa, they don't deal with something called a Literary Executor? They will appoint a co-executor to your Will but not a Literary Executor. O_o!?!? 'Cause I researched it and a Literary executor will specifically deal with any and all issues as far as your writings, royalties, etc. So I thought, cool! Sorted! But when I go to talk to the attorney who holds my Will? That's what I come to find out. It doesn't make any sense to me and it never will since South Africa is fulllll of authors?

Anyhoo. Lemme get to work! (Note? She presents herself as a woman who has PUBLISHED HER WRITINGS? Has she? I know when I checked in July? I found nothing. >_< And I find it hard to believe that she wouldn't advertise her own completed works on things like her blog and facebook and whatever else. This is another reason why I posted this. She has no problems with lying. And then even when she tells the truth, there is always some element of deceit. It's a waste of time, but it is a part of who she is. A dangerous part....)
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